The Mystery Of The Disappearing Fish

Over the years, we've helped a lot of people open new businesses.  Many have been successful and some have failed but probably the most interesting was the local Pet Shop that we were hired to automate.  We were approached by a man opening this pet store to install point-of-sale computers and software at the last minute before they opened for business.

We rushed everything in and did a pretty good job of getting everything ready for them.  I even stayed around to help them learn how to use the software which they got from their supplies vendor.  How tough could it be, right?

The shop was pretty, the shelves were stocked, the birds were in their cages and the puppies were frolicking in their enclosure.  All was right with world, right? . . . Until . . . the owner approached me with a problem.  His fish tank was empty.  Almost all of the fish he had purchased for resale were gone!  He asked me if I could help him figure out where his fish went.  IT guys must know something about aquarium keeping, right?  I helped him examine all of his tanks and sure enough all but one was empty.  He then explained that he had put all of his expensive marine fish into one tank so nothing would happen to them and all but one fish was gone. 

Now, I'm no fish expert but I've had marine tanks before and even I know that not all marine fish play well together and they need to be kept together with "compatible" playmates.

We looked into the one tank he claimed he put all of the expensive marine fish and sure enough there was only one fish left . . . a really satisfied looking and well-fed Lion Fish.  Uh, boss, you put all the fish in a tank with a carnivore!  He had eaten all of them faster than you could say "fish food".  That's where are your other fish went.  So much for the aquatics department.

Then things started to become apparent that there was a disaster in the making here.  As I watched over the employees entering data, the question of what to charge came up and the owner sidled over to me and whispered "What should I charge for the bird seed? . . . the dog biscuits?  . . . the kitty litter?"   Now IT guys were pricing experts too?  I didn't like where this was heading.  The guy didn't know what the market price was for anything!  I asked him what his competitors charged.  Didn't he "shop" his competition before starting this venture?  His response "Uh no, they might recognize me."

Finally, the day of the grand opening was at hand and the shop still wasn't ready as the employees were still trying to guess at what to charge for everything.  Customers were knocking at the door and each time the owner would shout "Go Away, we're not ready!" and the rest of us would cringe.

When the owner wasn't looking a customer sneaked in and found a puppy he wanted to buy for his wife.  He marched up to the front counter with tiny puppy nestled into the crook of his arm and demanded "How much for the dog?"  I called the owner over and asked him the same question.  He whispered back "What should I charge?"  Taken aback, I replied "Well, what did it cost you?"  His response?  "Uh, I don't know."  Uh, oh!  Finally, I whispered to him "Will you take such-and-such?" and he replied "OK" and the shop made it's first sale before the owner could change his mind.

Sadly, that moment turned out to the high point for the Pet Shop and within 6 months, I got a call from his bank asking if I wanted to buy a "well stocked" Pet Shop.  I got to know the banker when the checks from the pet shop started bouncing and I had to hand carry them into the bank for redemption.  Apparently, disappearing fish weren't the only problem.  It also had a bad case of disappearing customers and disappearing cash.